Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
My liver just broke up with me...
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Randomize
