And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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