bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I got her a Nickelback box set.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
