Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
