Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
please come you make the beer taste better
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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