is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.