Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
