and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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