My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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