Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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