i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Randomize
