GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
