...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
