ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
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