wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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