Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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