So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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