i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
