He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
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