Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.