I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
