Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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