I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Randomize
