you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
YOU NEED TO STOP BLOWING DUDES ON MY COUCH AT MY PARTIES
YOU NEED TO STOP PROVIDING TEQUILA AT YOUR PARTIES
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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