Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
he had hair everywhere except his balls
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
