I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
