You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
