i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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