I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
