I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.