If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize