Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants