similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
