Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize
