btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
