Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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