The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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