You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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