return my video game
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
it glows. i had to have it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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