so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
