white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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