Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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