Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Randomize
