Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
