he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
