"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Randomize
