afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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