can we get nightvision for the apartment?
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize