lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Randomize
