I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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